EmergyCare has launched a new rewards program that will provide people who frequently overdose on heroin the opportunity to earn a free dose of the revival drug Narcan.
Users will be given a punch card that offers the tenth dose free. “We saw other businesses using punch cards and thought we could try it,” said EmergyCare spokesman Mike Belitsky. “For example, I’m only 23 cups of coffee away from a free one at Starbucks, so I’ll keep going back. Just like we want people calling EmergyCare when they need Narcan.”
Attempts to reach heroin users for comment were unsuccessful as there was no response after knocking on several McDonald’s restroom doors.
gooferie 
this is messed up
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This is hilarious.
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