Letter Writer Proves There Is No God

no-baby-jesus

 Life’s essential mystery was solved last week by an Erie man whose Letter to the Editor factually and definitively proved that God does not exist.

Bart Brucewin, a professed atheist, had sparred for years with Christians in the Letters to the Editor page of the Erie Times-News.  The battle was fierce and well-fought, with average readers wavering between atheism and devout faith in a Supreme Being, depending on whose letter was published that day.

But Brucewin’s letter last September 16th – under the headline ”Stop being such idiots” –  finally settled the issue.  The letter was so convincing, so unassailable in its logic, that even the most devout believers were forced to concede defeat.

“I’ve got to admit, he’s right”, said Florence Gumbleton, a former Methodist and past opponent in the Letters page.  “Now I just have to figure out what to do with my Sundays.”

Brucewin passed up the opportunity to gloat when contacted by Gooferie last evening.

“I knew that if I could just put down on paper what I knew in my head to be true, people would finally understand,” he said.

Meanwhile, he declined comment on a letter published yesterday, which claimed that Brucewin’s September 16th letter contains a coded message predicting the end of the world, which will happen on August 11, 2019.

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