UPMC To Merge With Country Fair


Officials at UPMC have announced a merger with Country Fair. Ted Gross, spokesman for UPMC stated: “At UPMC, patient care has always been on the list of things we care about.  With this merger, we can profit from the cigarettes and unhealthy food when our future patients buy it, and then profit again when they need our services later. It’s win-win.” He then added “For us.” The chain of convenience stores will henceforth be called “UPMC Country Fair.”


  1. UPMC does have their foot in every door! And, if they don’t, you can bet that Erie Insurance does! Erie Insurance bought out a small convenient store-gas station at 6th and Holland. They really hurt all of us living at Schmid Towers. Many of us don’t drive anymore or no car…….we depended on Lucky’s being there for us! What could they possibly do with that SMALL piece of land??? Probably a mini parking ramp to hold twenty cars…..Thanks a lot for hurting innocent people. 😠☹️


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