City Council Envious Of County Council’s Accidental Lockout

Some members of Erie City Council are speaking out today after members of the public were reportedly locked out of a County Council meeting. “Why doesn’t that ever happen to us?” said one City Council member. This member refused to give her first name but asked us to refer to her as “President Liz”.  “I have the gavel.” she told us. “But no matter how many times I bang it, the speakers keep talking. Nobody respects the gavel anymore.”

Another member, who also declined to give his name but called himself “Eddie B.” agreed. “Yap yap yap.” he told us. “We generously give them, what is it? Two minutes or something, I dunno. But they never shut their pieholes. Like a bunch of old women.”  He went on to say that the citizens who speak at City Council meetings are “…always droning on and on about the same stuff. Blah, blah funding, blah blah safety. “

Both anonymous Council members concurred with each other. President Liz said “ It would just be better to leave the public out of this and let us do our thing.” Eddie B. told us “It’s amazing how many of these folks think we actually listen to them. I don’t even listen to my fellow Council members. Especially the girls.” 

On that one point President Liz disagreed with Eddie B. “Oh he has to listen to me now. I may have struggled to wrestle it out of his grip but I do have the gavel!”