Erie Diocese to get “Broom of Shame” from Vatican

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In light of Bishop Lawrence Persico’s failure to cover up a sexual harassment scandal involving a priest from DuBois, The Vatican has announced that it is sending the Erie Diocese the “Scopa Autem Turpitudinum” (literally translated as “Broom of Shame”), to help the bishop sweep scandals under the rug.

“It’s our hope that the presence of this blessed broom will help keep any more scandals from reaching the ears of our parishioners,” said Bishop Persico. “I’m also asking all Erie Catholics to pray that the Diocese can get those that were harmed by the behavior of our clergy to sign the nondisclosure agreements.”

The bishop also announced that the sacred broom, which has been in use by the Church since the Middle Ages, will be kept in the sanctuary at St. Peter’s Cathedral. “The Erie Diocese with have the Scopa until another diocese needs it to cover up a scandal, so those wishing to view it should come sooner rather than later.”

Comments

  1. Sandra Barrett says:

    Shame?!! Non-disclosure?!! Perhaps every criminal should be given a naughty naughty broom so they can sweep it under the rug! The victim, however, will never be able to sweep it clean. The response by the Vatican is as pitiful as the crime itself.

    Like

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